trust your 'new mom' gut
A mother's intuition is nothing to discount. It's like an unwritten part of curriculum in any maternal/newborn/child healthcare profession to really LISTEN to a mother's story. From the moment a mother feels her baby move in her womb, or holds her baby for the first time, her instincts are in tune to her child's needs and behaviors. As time goes on and the bond grows stronger, a mother may not always know the problem, but she has the most curious gut feeling about EVERY baby behavior. Sometimes it's fruitful, and sometimes its not. The important thing is for mothers to know that they are never alone and help is available.
Once upon a memory, when my now big kids were wee little bundles, I recall worrying for DAYS before I humbled myself to ask someone for help. I remember I'd have this 'gut feeling,' but I'd hesitate on my instincts. Time would go by, and not only would my problem grow, but my mental health would waiver getting there!
This tiny seed of concern would replay in my mind until it developed into a hypothetical tragedy of scary inadequacies or health conditions that sucked the life from me.
The thing was, once I addressed my concern, I was so frustrated with how I let that situation get the best of me! I remember thinking- "I stressed for 3 days (or 3 weeks!) about this 'thing' that (insert person or service) just helped me fix for me and my baby!"
I find this with mothers in the hospital too! I walk into the room, tears streaming down her face...words are flooding out of her mouth, (Ugly crying) "My baby is fussy and I can't get him to eat and his diapers not dirty and I've rocked him and he won't eat and he must not like me and I'm FAILINGGGGG!" Lots of TEARS!!! The thing is, she knows something isn't right. Turns out, once this concern is exposed, this mom can be educated that her baby is going through second night syndrome! I ask myself, why didn't she hit the call bell to ask? Once we chat, the tears are wiped away as she learns this is normal! If I had not walked in, how long would she have let this eat her up? Her baby is just overwhelmed by his first 48 hours of life and just wants quiet, skin-to-skin, heartbeat-to-heartbeat rest (this is a real thing, new moms)! The gut feeling she had was spot on, but instead of asking for help, her seed of concern has developed into perceived failure! DISCLAIMER: the outcome doesn't always come with a 'normal' report that a little education can fix, but making your concerns known is a great first step.
The heart of Oh Eve Motherhood was built on stories like this- my own personal experiences, and those of hundreds of mothers I've met along my journey. I urge mothers to never hesitate to humble themselves and ASK THE QUESTIONS. Trust your guts, and nip the doubts in the butt! Motherhood is too amazing to let worry overcome you!
I respect the honor it is to be a part of these stories. It is not easy to ask for help. Over and over I get to see the growth in perseverance, the formation of unstoppable love, and the mad momma bear skills that are developing when moms and babies overcome these obstacles. I care that your motherhood journey is every bit of what you imagine it to be. More than anything, I wish I could wrap the moms living these stories in a big ol' COVID free hug and have them see all their struggles from the other side. Moms are amazing. Trust your gut and nip doubt in the butt. You won't regret it.
